Tuesday, March 05 2013
Remember the lion in the “Wizard of Oz”? He desperately wants to find courage. Interestingly, when we first meet the lion in the film, he is taunting and criticizing the other characters until Dorothy confronts him about his behavior. Then, the lion confesses to the others that he is a coward and ashamed of himself, before they all trot off to see the wizard. Surely, the lion would have benefitted from more encouragement as a cub.
Encouragement means to give courage by building self-e...
Posted at 02:23 pm in general parenting
Tuesday, February 12 2013
“It should be a privilege to be able to say "I love you" to someone. It shouldn't be something people say just because they feel like it. A privilege that is earned. They say you have to earn the right to be loved; no, love is unconditional, if you love someone, they don't have to earn it. But. The right to tell someone that you love them? That has to be earned. You have to earn the right to be believed.” ~ C. Joy Bell C., author
As we approach Valentine’s Day, I am sharing this thought-prov...
Posted at 05:57 pm in general parenting
Monday, February 04 2013
The importance of play for children has been written and spoken about for many years. Play is a child’s work; it is how they learn and make sense of their world. Did you know play is also a powerful tool for relieving stress for both children and their adult caretakers? Lawrence Cohn, author of "Playful Parenting", suggests that play can be used to diffuse tension around highly charged situations.
Most parents have recurring patterns with their children which leave them frustrated and exh...
Tuesday, January 22 2013
No matter how calmly you try to referee, parenting will eventually produce bizarre behavior, and I'm not talking about the kids. Their behavior is always normal.
Parents, can you relate to this beloved comedian’s quote? We all have moments when we lose control and regret our behavior. Children, on the other hand, are expected to have tantrums when they are young. They are still learning how to regulate their emotions and impulses. As adults, children need us to be a calm and ...
Tuesday, December 18 2012
The horrific events in Newtown, CT last Friday are on all of our minds and hearts. For parents, this is an opportunity to talk less and listen more to our children about their thoughts, feelings and fears. The key, and challenge, for us as parents is to be truly present for our children and not impose our feelings and fears upon them. The following links are helpful resources for parents on talking and listening to children about community violence:
Posted at 07:47 pm in general parenting
Tuesday, November 13 2012
The Child’s Need for Independence Is as Strong as the Child’s Need for Love
The “terrible two’s,” “difficult” children who refuse to go with the flow, and parent-child “power struggles” are common parenting challenges that share a central theme. In each case, the child’s need for independence is clashing with the parent’s need for authority. Two-year-olds relish their newfound awareness of their individuality and preferences. They may protest decisions that do not meet with...
Friday, October 12 2012
Think of being on an airplane listening to the flight attendant’s safety instructions. “Put your oxygen mask on before assisting other passengers.” This is a great metaphor for parenting. We must acknowledge and address our own feelings and needs before we can help our child deal with his feelings and needs.
What are your feelings about your little one staying with a nanny or going off to day care or nursery school? It is natural for parents to feel a sense of loss when returning to wor...
Tuesday, September 25 2012
Life if full of unexpected twists and turns and, as my father says, “opportunties to grow.” These learning opportunities or “problems” begin to present themselves when we are very young and continue throughout our lives. As parents, we need to be aware to step back at times so our children can learn from the experience.
This is much easier said than done. We desperately want our children’s lives to run smoothly. We also want them to be happy. In addition, we have so much wisdom to shar...
Posted at 03:48 pm in general parenting
Tuesday, September 18 2012
Are you tired of hearing the word “No”? In families with young children, the word “No” can be overused by both parents and children. Parents share they are tired of hearing themselves say it over and over again to exhaust behaviors their children continue repeating, such as “no climbing on the dishwasher.” Young children with their newfound sense of individuality find the word very empowering and use it often to express their preferences. For example, “do you want to eat lunch now?” may be ...
Posted at 01:52 pm in general parenting
Monday, September 10 2012
The school buses are on the roads, children with backpacks are out and about, and the preschools are surrounded by parked vehicles during drop-off and pick-up times. For some children, they are experiencing school for the first time. For others, they are transitioning from preschool to kindergarten, or from elementary to middle school, and so on. So, how's it going? A loaded question, I know, but one worthy of consideration. Getting up and out on time, lunches packed, and remembering everyt...